IELTS Academic Writing Task 1 – Sample Test 24 (Bar + Line Chart)
Task Question
The chart below compares the production and consumption of electricity in a country between 2010 and 2020.
Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Figure: Electricity production and consumption in a country (2010–2020)
Sample Answer (Band 8.0–8.5)
The bar and line chart illustrate the annual electricity production and consumption in a given country from 2010 to 2020. Overall, electricity generation consistently exceeded usage, although both showed a steady upward trend across the decade.
In 2010, the country produced roughly 420 terawatt-hours (TWh) of electricity, while consumption stood slightly lower at 400 TWh. Both figures rose gradually over time, with production reaching around 520 TWh and consumption close to 500 TWh by 2015.
Between 2016 and 2020, the upward trajectory continued, though at a slightly faster pace for production. By the end of the period, output peaked at 620 TWh, whereas demand climbed to approximately 580 TWh. This indicates a persistent surplus of electricity, averaging 30–40 TWh annually.
In summary, both electricity generation and consumption expanded steadily over the decade, with production remaining consistently ahead of demand, ensuring the country’s energy self-sufficiency.
Analytical Review – IELTS Academic Writing Task 1 (Test 24, Bar + Line Chart)
Overall Verdict
Indicative band: 8.0–8.5
- Task Achievement: Both production and consumption trends were described with clear comparisons and quantified details.
- Coherence & Cohesion: Logical sequencing: initial figures → gradual rise → end-of-period surplus.
- Lexical Resource: Effective use of academic terms like “trajectory,” “persistent surplus,” “self-sufficiency.”
- Grammar: Accurate complex sentences with comparatives and passives used appropriately.
Key Weaknesses
- Quantification: More precise contrasts (e.g., “a surplus of exactly 40 TWh”) could strengthen the analysis.
- Variety: Some verbs of increase (“rose,” “grew”) were repeated and could be replaced with higher-level synonyms.
- Analytical depth: Broader implications of energy surplus (e.g., export potential, sustainability) were not considered.
- Sentence length: A few sentences remain dense and could be split for clarity.
Actionable Improvements (High-Impact)
- Sharpen quantification: State exact surpluses per year to reinforce numerical precision.
- Diversify verbs: Replace “rose” with “climbed,” “escalated,” “expanded.”
- Highlight trade-offs: Link the consistent surplus with reduced import dependency.
- Shorten clauses: Break long descriptive sentences into two concise ones for readability.
- Deeper narrative: Stress the sustainability and reliability of the country’s energy supply.
Stronger Synonyms (Topic-Fit)
- increase → climb escalate expand surge
- decrease → drop fall off contract
- surplus → excess reserve margin
- production → generation output
- consumption → demand utilisation
Linking Devices (Cohesion)
- Contrast: whereas, by contrast, unlike, on the other hand
- Addition: moreover, in addition, likewise, also
- Result: as a result, therefore, consequently, hence
- Time: initially, subsequently, over the decade, by 2020
- Emphasis: notably, strikingly, critically, above all
- Quant cues: doubled, tripled, exceeded by, reduced by half
High-Value Collocations (Energy Context)
- energy self-sufficiency
- persistent electricity surplus
- steady upward trajectory
- domestic consumption patterns
- long-term sustainability
- national energy output
- reserve capacity margin
Rewrite Upgrades (Band-9 polish)
-
Original: “Both production and consumption rose steadily.”
Upgrade: “Electricity production and demand escalated consistently throughout the decade, with output persistently outstripping usage.” -
Original: “Production was higher than consumption.”
Upgrade: “Electricity generation remained ahead of demand by a notable margin, ensuring a stable energy reserve.” -
Original: “By 2020, production reached 620 TWh.”
Upgrade: “By 2020, electricity output peaked at 620 TWh, representing an overall expansion of nearly 50% compared to 2010 levels.”
Model Sentences (Precise Quantification)
- “In 2010, production exceeded demand by 20 TWh, and this surplus widened to 40 TWh a decade later.”
- “Electricity consumption expanded by 45% between 2010 and 2020, rising from 400 TWh to nearly 580 TWh.”
- “Despite rising demand, output consistently remained higher, highlighting the robustness of the energy sector.”
Grammar Targets
- Comparatives: “X exceeded Y by 40 TWh.”
- Passives: “Electricity output was increased steadily over the decade.”
- Nominalisation: “A consistent surplus was observed throughout the period.”
- Adverbials: “markedly expanded,” “gradually escalated,” “consistently higher.”
Quick Checklist (Before Submit)
- Overview emphasises both production and consumption trends.
- Numbers include explicit surpluses and quantified differences.
- Lexical variety avoids repetition of “rose” and “increase.”
- Sentences clear, concise, with complex structures balanced.
- Collocations specific to energy and electricity context.
تحلیل دوزبانه – IELTS Academic Writing Task 1 (Test 24, Bar + Line Chart)
ارزیابی کلی
نمره تقریبی: 8.0 تا 8.5
- پوشش همزمان تولید و مصرف برق با جزئیات کمی
- انسجام مناسب: شروع از ارقام اولیه → روند رشد → مازاد پایانی
- واژگان تخصصی مانند «خودکفایی انرژی»، «مازاد پایدار»، «الگوی مصرف داخلی»
- گرامر دقیق با جملات مرکب، مقایسهای و مجهول
Overall Verdict
Indicative band: 8.0–8.5
- Task Achievement: Both production and consumption trends were described with clear comparisons and quantified details.
- Coherence & Cohesion: Logical sequencing: initial figures → gradual rise → end-of-period surplus.
- Lexical Resource: Effective use of academic terms like “trajectory,” “persistent surplus,” “self-sufficiency.”
- Grammar: Accurate complex sentences with comparatives and passives used appropriately.
نقاط ضعف
- نیاز به بیان دقیقتر اختلافات عددی (مثل ۲۰ تراوات ساعت مازاد)
- تکرار افعال «رشد» و «افزایش» بدون تنوع کافی
- تحلیل عمیقتر درباره پیامدهای مازاد انرژی (مثل صادرات یا پایداری) ارائه نشده
- برخی جملات طولانی و فشردهاند
Key Weaknesses
- Quantification: More precise contrasts (e.g., “a surplus of exactly 40 TWh”) could strengthen the analysis.
- Variety: Some verbs of increase (“rose,” “grew”) were repeated and could be replaced with higher-level synonyms.
- Analytical depth: Broader implications of energy surplus (e.g., export potential, sustainability) were not considered.
- Sentence length: A few sentences remain dense and could be split for clarity.
پیشنهادهای بهبود
- تأکید دقیق روی اختلافات سالانه با ذکر مازاد عددی
- استفاده از مترادفهای متنوع برای افعال رشد
- پیوند مازاد انرژی با کاهش واردات و امنیت انرژی
- کوتاه کردن جملههای طولانی برای وضوح بیشتر
- برجستهسازی پایداری و خودکفایی انرژی به عنوان روایت اصلی
Actionable Improvements
- Sharpen quantification: State exact surpluses per year to reinforce numerical precision.
- Diversify verbs: Replace “rose” with “climbed,” “escalated,” “expanded.”
- Highlight trade-offs: Link the consistent surplus with reduced import dependency.
- Shorten clauses: Break long descriptive sentences into two concise ones for readability.
- Deeper narrative: Stress the sustainability and reliability of the country’s energy supply.
مترادفهای قوی
- افزایش → climb, escalate, expand, surge
- کاهش → drop, fall off, contract
- مازاد → excess, reserve, margin
- تولید → generation, output
- مصرف → demand, utilisation
Stronger Synonyms
- increase → climb, escalate, expand, surge
- decrease → drop, fall off, contract
- surplus → excess, reserve, margin
- production → generation, output
- consumption → demand, utilisation
حروف ربط
- تضاد: whereas, by contrast, unlike
- افزودن: moreover, likewise, in addition
- نتیجه: therefore, consequently, as a result
- زمان: initially, subsequently, by 2020
Linking Devices
- Contrast: whereas, by contrast, unlike
- Addition: moreover, in addition, likewise
- Result: therefore, consequently, as a result
- Time: initially, subsequently, by 2020
- Emphasis: notably, strikingly, critically
- Quant cues: doubled, tripled, exceeded by
کالوکیشنهای کلیدی
- خودکفایی انرژی → energy self-sufficiency
- مازاد پایدار برق → persistent electricity surplus
- روند صعودی پایدار → steady upward trajectory
- الگوی مصرف داخلی → domestic consumption patterns
- پایداری بلندمدت → long-term sustainability
High-Value Collocations
- energy self-sufficiency
- persistent electricity surplus
- steady upward trajectory
- domestic consumption patterns
- long-term sustainability