IELTS Academic Writing Task 1 – Sample Test 21 (Multi-Line Graph)
Task Question
The line graph below shows the growth index (2019 = 100) of five leading technology companies – Apple, Microsoft, Google, Amazon, and OpenAI – between 2019 and 2024.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Figure: Growth index of major tech firms (2019–2024)
Sample Answer (Band 8–8.5)
The multi-line graph illustrates the indexed growth of five global technology companies from 2019 to 2024, using 2019 as the baseline year (100).
Overall, all firms experienced upward trends, but at markedly different rates. Apple and Microsoft displayed the most consistent expansion, while OpenAI, despite starting at the same baseline, witnessed the sharpest late surge.
In detail, Apple’s index rose gradually to around 160 by 2022 and peaked close to 190 in 2024, mirroring Microsoft’s trajectory, which climbed slightly higher to approximately 200 by the end of the period. Google also expanded steadily but at a more moderate pace, reaching roughly 170. Amazon initially matched Apple and Microsoft, but after 2021 its growth slowed, stabilising at just under 150 by 2024.
By contrast, OpenAI remained relatively flat until 2021, before accelerating sharply, overtaking Amazon and approaching 180 in 2024. This late surge highlights its rapid emergence as a major competitor in the sector.
In summary, while Apple and Microsoft maintained long-term leadership, OpenAI demonstrated the most dramatic late growth, contrasting with Amazon’s slowdown.
Analytical Review – IELTS Academic Writing Task 1 (Test 21, Multi-Line Graph)
Overall Verdict
Indicative band: 8.0–8.5
- Task Achievement: All five companies are described with clear trends; Apple and Microsoft highlighted as leaders, OpenAI noted for its sharp surge.
- Coherence & Cohesion: Chronological description (2019–2024) with logical grouping of companies (steady vs. fluctuating vs. late surge).
- Lexical Resource: Advanced terms used: “trajectory,” “overtaking,” “sharp surge,” “stabilised.”
- Grammar: Accurate passives and complex clauses; good balance of comparatives.
Key Weaknesses
- Quantification: Some figures (e.g., exact end points of Google, Amazon) could be expressed with sharper numerical contrasts.
- Comparisons: While leaders vs. laggards are clear, cross-company contrasts (Apple vs. Microsoft, Amazon vs. OpenAI) could be more explicit.
- Lexical range: Repetition of “growth” and “rise”; more synonyms could enhance variety.
- Sentence density: A few sentences remain long; could be divided for readability.
Actionable Improvements (High-Impact)
- Add precise deltas: e.g., “OpenAI jumped from 100 in 2021 to nearly 180 in 2024 (+80 index points).”
- Sharpen contrasts: Directly link Amazon’s slowdown to OpenAI’s acceleration.
- Lexical upgrade: Replace “rise” with “escalate,” “climb,” or “gain momentum.”
- Simplify phrasing: Break overly long comparative sentences into two clear ones.
- Highlight extremes: Emphasise that Microsoft peaked highest overall, while Amazon stagnated.
Stronger Synonyms (Topic-Fit)
- increase → escalate climb gain ground accelerate
- decrease → decline dip contract
- steady → consistent gradual sustained
- rapid rise → surge spike upswing
Linking Devices (Cohesion)
- Contrast: whereas, by contrast, unlike, in opposition
- Addition: moreover, in addition, likewise
- Result: consequently, therefore, as a result
- Time/Sequence: initially, subsequently, over the period, by 2024
- Emphasis: notably, strikingly, critically
- Quant cues: doubled, surged by, overtook, peaked at
High-Value Collocations (Business Growth)
- consistent trajectory
- late-stage surge
- market stabilisation
- emerging competitor
- growth plateau
- outpaced rivals
- sector dominance
Rewrite Upgrades (Band-9 polish)
-
Original: “OpenAI remained flat before surging after 2021.”
Upgrade: “OpenAI plateaued initially, then experienced a dramatic surge post-2021, outpacing Amazon by the end of the period.” -
Original: “Amazon slowed after 2021.”
Upgrade: “Amazon’s index stagnated beyond 2021, settling just under 150, in stark contrast to OpenAI’s upswing.” -
Original: “Microsoft climbed steadily.”
Upgrade: “Microsoft maintained a consistent upward trajectory, ultimately peaking at the highest index value of 200.”
Model Sentences (Precise Quantification)
- “By 2024, Microsoft’s index peaked at 200, surpassing Apple by around 10 points.”
- “OpenAI accelerated from 100 in 2021 to 180 in 2024, an unprecedented late surge.”
- “Amazon’s index plateaued just below 150, marking the weakest trajectory among the five.”
Grammar Targets
- Comparatives: “X outpaced Y by 30 points.”
- Passives: “The company’s growth was sustained until 2024.”
- Nominalisation: “A marked acceleration was observed in OpenAI’s trend.”
- Adverbials: “notably surged,” “gradually stabilised.”
Quick Checklist (Before Submit)
- Overview covers leaders vs. laggards (Apple/Microsoft vs. Amazon/OpenAI).
- Numbers included with precise contrasts.
- Lexical variety applied beyond “rise/fall.”
- Sentences concise, varied with complex forms.
- Collocations topic-specific to tech and growth trends.
تحلیل دوزبانه – IELTS Academic Writing Task 1 (Test 21, Multi-Line Graph)
ارزیابی کلی
نمره تقریبی: 8.0 تا 8.5
- توصیف کامل پنج شرکت برتر فناوری با تمرکز روی رهبران (اپل و مایکروسافت) و جهش ناگهانی OpenAI
- انسجام زمانی از ۲۰۱۹ تا ۲۰۲۴ با گروهبندی منطقی (رشد پایدار، نوسانی، جهش دیرهنگام)
- واژگان پیشرفته مانند «trajectory»، «overtaking»، «sharp surge»، «stabilised»
- گرامر دقیق شامل مجهول، قیاسی و جملات مرکب
Overall Verdict
Indicative band: 8.0–8.5
- Task Achievement: All five companies are described with clear trends; Apple and Microsoft highlighted as leaders, OpenAI noted for its sharp surge.
- Coherence & Cohesion: Chronological description (2019–2024) with logical grouping of companies (steady vs. fluctuating vs. late surge).
- Lexical Resource: Advanced terms used: “trajectory,” “overtaking,” “sharp surge,” “stabilised.”
- Grammar: Accurate passives and complex clauses; good balance of comparatives.
نقاط ضعف
- عددگذاری دقیق در برخی مقایسهها کمرنگ است (مثلاً انتهای روند گوگل و آمازون)
- مقایسههای بینشرکتی (اپل/مایکروسافت و آمازون/OpenAI) میتوانست روشنتر باشد
- تکرار زیاد واژگانی مثل «growth» و «rise»
- چند جمله طولانی که میتوانستند سادهتر شوند
Key Weaknesses
- Quantification: Some figures (e.g., exact end points of Google, Amazon) could be expressed with sharper numerical contrasts.
- Comparisons: While leaders vs. laggards are clear, cross-company contrasts (Apple vs. Microsoft, Amazon vs. OpenAI) could be more explicit.
- Lexical range: Repetition of “growth” and “rise”; more synonyms could enhance variety.
- Sentence density: A few sentences remain long; could be divided for readability.
پیشنهادهای بهبود
- بیان دقیق اختلافها: «OpenAI از ۱۰۰ به ۱۸۰ رسید (+۸۰ واحد)»
- پیوند مستقیم کاهش آمازون با جهش OpenAI
- جایگزینی واژگان تکراری با اصطلاحات قویتر (escalate, gain momentum)
- شکستن جملات طولانی به دو جمله کوتاهتر
- تأکید روی افراط و تفریط: اوج مایکروسافت در مقابل رکود آمازون
Actionable Improvements
- Add precise deltas: e.g., “OpenAI jumped from 100 in 2021 to nearly 180 in 2024 (+80 index points).”
- Sharpen contrasts: Directly link Amazon’s slowdown to OpenAI’s acceleration.
- Lexical upgrade: Replace “rise” with “escalate,” “climb,” or “gain momentum.”
- Simplify phrasing: Break overly long comparative sentences into two clear ones.
- Highlight extremes: Emphasise that Microsoft peaked highest overall, while Amazon stagnated.
مترادفهای قوی
- افزایش → escalate, climb, gain ground, accelerate
- کاهش → decline, dip, contract
- پایدار → consistent, gradual, sustained
- جهش سریع → surge, spike, upswing
Stronger Synonyms
- increase → escalate, climb, gain ground, accelerate
- decrease → decline, dip, contract
- steady → consistent, gradual, sustained
- rapid rise → surge, spike, upswing
حروف ربط
- تضاد: whereas, by contrast, unlike
- افزودن: moreover, likewise, in addition
- نتیجه: therefore, consequently, as a result
- زمان: initially, subsequently, by 2024
Linking Devices
- Contrast: whereas, by contrast, unlike, in opposition
- Addition: moreover, in addition, likewise
- Result: consequently, therefore, as a result
- Time: initially, subsequently, over the period, by 2024
- Emphasis: notably, strikingly, critically
- Quant cues: doubled, surged by, overtook, peaked at
کالوکیشنهای کلیدی
- روند پایدار → consistent trajectory
- جهش دیرهنگام → late-stage surge
- ثبات بازار → market stabilisation
- رقیب نوظهور → emerging competitor
- رکود رشد → growth plateau
- پیشی گرفتن از رقبا → outpaced rivals
- سلطه در بازار → sector dominance
High-Value Collocations
- consistent trajectory
- late-stage surge
- market stabilisation
- emerging competitor
- growth plateau
- outpaced rivals
- sector dominance